Sometimes I like to think about our annual cycle in terms of insects. Instead of four seasons, there are three. They are called High Bugs, Low Bugs and No Bugs. High Bugs being the months of April through September, Low bugs being the months of October and March and No Bugs are the months of November through February. Keep in mind my view is derived from growing up in central Illinois.
I don't mind insects at all. Sure they bug me sometimes, but they were here first and all. My impartiality is probably from the many camping trips I took as a child. Nature, and bugs, just seemed like a natural thing. You learn to deal with, or just coexist with the little buggers.
Then, you had a cool four months off from them. Aside from the random roach or house spider. Thankfully I've only seen the house spider. That's why I keep him around.
I'd like to, for no good reason, tell you about some insects and their relation to me. Since we're in full High Bug season, I thought it was a good time.
The Good
I don't mind insects at all. Sure they bug me sometimes, but they were here first and all. My impartiality is probably from the many camping trips I took as a child. Nature, and bugs, just seemed like a natural thing. You learn to deal with, or just coexist with the little buggers.
Then, you had a cool four months off from them. Aside from the random roach or house spider. Thankfully I've only seen the house spider. That's why I keep him around.
I'd like to, for no good reason, tell you about some insects and their relation to me. Since we're in full High Bug season, I thought it was a good time.
The Good
The Dragon Fly.
I love these guys. Their just wickedly cool. Around July and August, one always makes the small parking lot at my work its turf. It spends most of the day hovering above one car to the next. It's very loyal. I'm not sure if it's looking at its reflection in our cars or just basking in the heat they radiate. I just know that that son of a bitch works damn hard all day to ensure I don't get bothered by any mosquitoes on my way to the car.
The Jumping Spider.
These little jumpers are the cutest darn spiders. They also provide my work with a valuable service as well. We usually get three to four taking up shop in our shop. They hang around the windowsills mostly and catch the stupid big bumbling flies that wander in. They're messy little things though. The fly carcasses pile up pretty quick and I must clean up after them. But since they provide the service of fly busting, I can't complain.
The Praying Mantis.
My favorite insect. When we lived out in the country we had a small screened in front porch. The screen, like the house, was old and it had a few holes and openings so many bugs would come in. And praying mantises would always follow to clean house. We would sit and watch them stalk a trapped wasp or a menacing looking spider. And always, a lone female would lay her egg sack on one of the beams in the fall. One day, next spring, we would see the egg open up hand hundreds of translucent mantises come spilling out. A couple of weeks would pass and I would start to see them again except they were ten times larger. Still only about an inch tall, but still. They would climb on the tip of my finger and do this little jig, swaying back and forth. Then they would be off to make sure my porch was clean again.
The Bad
I love these guys. Their just wickedly cool. Around July and August, one always makes the small parking lot at my work its turf. It spends most of the day hovering above one car to the next. It's very loyal. I'm not sure if it's looking at its reflection in our cars or just basking in the heat they radiate. I just know that that son of a bitch works damn hard all day to ensure I don't get bothered by any mosquitoes on my way to the car.
The Jumping Spider.
These little jumpers are the cutest darn spiders. They also provide my work with a valuable service as well. We usually get three to four taking up shop in our shop. They hang around the windowsills mostly and catch the stupid big bumbling flies that wander in. They're messy little things though. The fly carcasses pile up pretty quick and I must clean up after them. But since they provide the service of fly busting, I can't complain.
The Praying Mantis.
My favorite insect. When we lived out in the country we had a small screened in front porch. The screen, like the house, was old and it had a few holes and openings so many bugs would come in. And praying mantises would always follow to clean house. We would sit and watch them stalk a trapped wasp or a menacing looking spider. And always, a lone female would lay her egg sack on one of the beams in the fall. One day, next spring, we would see the egg open up hand hundreds of translucent mantises come spilling out. A couple of weeks would pass and I would start to see them again except they were ten times larger. Still only about an inch tall, but still. They would climb on the tip of my finger and do this little jig, swaying back and forth. Then they would be off to make sure my porch was clean again.
The Bad
The Mosquito.
This is a "duh" entry. Everyone, except a few warped scientists, hates these f*ckers. The fact that they kill more human beings and any other insect might have something to do with it. I live in Illinois. It used to be a swamp. We got em bad.
The Ant.
What? Why the ant you say? Because these little pricks make me be a better person. I have lots of brick in my back yard (paths, etc.). Ants love bricks. You know those ant supper highways you see in the jungle on the Discovery Channel? I have those. My ants are a third of the size of its jungle cousins but the effect is still the same. I'm amazed to watch millions of little creatures going from the middle of my back yard to the front somewhere. I haven't figured out what they're doing up there and I don't care. Those are ant problems. My problem is answering guests' questions of, "What the hell's that?" I would say, "Oh, that's just my ant super highway. Make sure you don't block it." But the reason they make me better is if I leave the merest fraction of a sour cream and onion potato chip on the kitchen counter, the next morning we'll have hundreds of guests. And they take a while to kick out. They'll stick around and see what else you got cooking. This forces me to keep the kitchen spotless in the summer. Thanks for all the extra work, ant jerks.
The Asian Ladybug.
I hate these asshole of an evasive species assholes the most. I really do. These assholes pinch my neck when I least expect it. And they stink if you squash them. Introduced to the USA back in the 70s, they've pretty much wiped out the nice, non-neck pinching red ladybugs in our area. I used to see them more as a child in the 80s, but rarely now. Did I mention these assholes pinch? Farmers, I know your crops are important, but please think the next time before you bring in a foreign insect to wipe out whatever pest is eating your plants. Thank you. Oh, and f*ck you.
The Pretty
This is a "duh" entry. Everyone, except a few warped scientists, hates these f*ckers. The fact that they kill more human beings and any other insect might have something to do with it. I live in Illinois. It used to be a swamp. We got em bad.
The Ant.
What? Why the ant you say? Because these little pricks make me be a better person. I have lots of brick in my back yard (paths, etc.). Ants love bricks. You know those ant supper highways you see in the jungle on the Discovery Channel? I have those. My ants are a third of the size of its jungle cousins but the effect is still the same. I'm amazed to watch millions of little creatures going from the middle of my back yard to the front somewhere. I haven't figured out what they're doing up there and I don't care. Those are ant problems. My problem is answering guests' questions of, "What the hell's that?" I would say, "Oh, that's just my ant super highway. Make sure you don't block it." But the reason they make me better is if I leave the merest fraction of a sour cream and onion potato chip on the kitchen counter, the next morning we'll have hundreds of guests. And they take a while to kick out. They'll stick around and see what else you got cooking. This forces me to keep the kitchen spotless in the summer. Thanks for all the extra work, ant jerks.
The Asian Ladybug.
I hate these asshole of an evasive species assholes the most. I really do. These assholes pinch my neck when I least expect it. And they stink if you squash them. Introduced to the USA back in the 70s, they've pretty much wiped out the nice, non-neck pinching red ladybugs in our area. I used to see them more as a child in the 80s, but rarely now. Did I mention these assholes pinch? Farmers, I know your crops are important, but please think the next time before you bring in a foreign insect to wipe out whatever pest is eating your plants. Thank you. Oh, and f*ck you.
The Pretty
Butterflies.
Who doesn't enjoy seeing a butterfly wisp past on a warm breeze? And not a single one has ever pinched my neck.
Sweat Bees.
I love when one of these little guys lands on my finger. They have an awesome iridescent carapace and mellow demeanor. They inspect my finger a little and then buzz off to probably pollinate some flower I probably enjoy.
The Cicada.
Yes, I know. Not the prettiest bug out there, but every year their lovely "zeuurry-zeuurry" song takes me back to a simpler time of dirt bike rides around dusk, gigantic bomb pops from the ice cream truck and trying to launch my GI-Joe figure with seven bottle rockets taped to his back.
Who doesn't enjoy seeing a butterfly wisp past on a warm breeze? And not a single one has ever pinched my neck.
Sweat Bees.
I love when one of these little guys lands on my finger. They have an awesome iridescent carapace and mellow demeanor. They inspect my finger a little and then buzz off to probably pollinate some flower I probably enjoy.
The Cicada.
Yes, I know. Not the prettiest bug out there, but every year their lovely "zeuurry-zeuurry" song takes me back to a simpler time of dirt bike rides around dusk, gigantic bomb pops from the ice cream truck and trying to launch my GI-Joe figure with seven bottle rockets taped to his back.
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5 comments:
Nice post, Manx. Altho I would add any stinger-equipped insect under the "Bad" header. I seem to be a magnet for those SOBs.
I have a pretty good idea what that dragonfly is doing in the parking lot. It's likely a female, and she's probably ovipositing or laying eggs. Too often, insects that lay their eggs in water will mistake shiney cars or pavement with heat waves coming off it as water and attempt to lay eggs there. It has something to do with their eyesight. Autos, pavement and water all reflect ultraviolet rays in a similar manner, I guess... I know... I'm a nerd. You should catch her and bing her to a wetland!!!!
Of course I could be way wrong. Maybe it's just hunting. Is there a wetland or a permanent stream or ditch near your work?
I think about bugs too much.
AC: Thanks. I know. There were too many I could have listed, but these three really get my goat.
CTC: I'm pretty sure the last couple have been males. One snatched a mosquito out of the air about a foot in front of my face. Plus they were medium size. I assume the females are larger. The first year I saw one, I think you are right. It was big. And I only ever saw it hover.
I work on a pretty industrial type street, but in the hot months when our air conditioning is going full steam, a condensation pool forms on the side of our building. It never gets stagnant and is always in the shade. It's probably where they keep coming from. But who knows? Probably you if you were here observing it.
Those "good" bugs ARE kinda cute, but if any of them landed on me, I would still flip out.
Manx, depending on the species, and when they emerged, they are all sizes, so that's not a really good way to tell sex. I usually deal with them when they are still living in the water, so I really have limited knowledge of adult dragonflies. They can fly from pretty far away though. I know that.
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